She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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