ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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