Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
