The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
