i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
