I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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