Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
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