I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
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