it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
