Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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