saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
