saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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