You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
