I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
