i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
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