my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Just took my morning after pill in the library
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
