You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
