i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
