i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
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