But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
