we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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