yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
