That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
