areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
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