We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
