this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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