6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I love you. Go after that dick
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
