nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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