I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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