I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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