I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
i think my cat just said my name.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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