"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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