grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
