I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize