big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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