bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
