I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Randomize
