he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
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