Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
it glows. i had to have it.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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