Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She told me I should be a condom model.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
