I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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