It's just like the Real World with babies
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize