please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
