guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
