What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
