The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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