I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
