They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Randomize
