Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
