I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
